Have you ever run out of toilet paper? My wife Jan is a toilet paper addict. I know as humans, we all have certain addictions but to be a toilet paper addict takes the cake. I believe this obsession took hold many years ago. Jan and I were sitting on the front porch and a young neighborhood girl strolled up to us with an empty toilet paper roll (the cardboard holder). The young girl said, "Hello, can I borrow some toilet paper, we ran out?" Jan and I looked at each other in disbelief. I've often heard of neighbors borrowing a cup of sugar or flour, but never toilet paper. The little girl's mother was probably sitting on the throne saying, "Will somebody get me some toilet paper?" The youngster then took action.
I can't remember if we did give the girl some toilet paper. I hope so, because her mother could still be waiting for it. From that point on, Jan always made sure we had enough tp in our house.
Last weekend we shopped at Wal-Mart. Just before we were ready to check out our purchases I said to Jan, "Is there anything else we need? Jan replied "We could use some toilet paper" I said " You've got to be kidding me!" Jan never buys just one pack of tp, but fills up the entire shopping cart. Nothing but the best too. Charmin Ultra. I'm beginning to think she is somehow related to Mr. Whipple. Gees, I know our basement is stockpiled with packages of tp. I relent and say "Okay, filler-up".
When we got home I checked out the inventory of tp. I counted 156 rolls. Yikes. I said," Jan we have 156 rolls of toilet paper, how many rolls do we use in a week?" She said, "Around 3 rolls a week." I quickly calculated 156 rolls divided by 3 gives us 52 weeks of toilet paper. I'm sure not too many people horde this much toilet paper. Jan said, " I know, but you never have enough toilet paper".