Listen People!!!

Well I'm back for another round of hilarity.

Does anybody out there enjoy receiving telephone calls that are "wrong numbers"? Of course not. I can tell you for a fact, we get our share of "wrong numbers" at the Roth Household. Unfortunately, our telephone number is similar to the Erie County Public Defender and the Erie County Humane Society. Go figure. Their phone numbers are 1 digit different than our phone number.

We always check our caller i.d. when someone calls our home. If it is a name or number we don't recognize, we simply let the answering machine handle the call. For years we have been getting wrong numbers, sometimes as many as 5 calls per day. Since I'm on hiatus (laid off) from my job, it has been increasingly annoying.

Let's go back in history for a moment. A few years ago I decided to record a greeting that lets the caller know who they have called. It goes like this, "You have reached 626-xxxx, this is NOT The Public Defender NOR the Humane Society. If you would like to speak to Mark or Jan leave a message at the tone". I have two words, "Listen People".

Okay, back to the present. It amazes me how many people do not listen to the greeting message. Most people will hang up when they realize they have dialed the wrong number. Sometimes they will call back 2 or 3 times just to verify they have the wrong number. For the other people that actually leave messages for The Public Defender or The Humane Society I have two words, "Listen People"!!!

I've come to the conclusion that there are a lot of people that are just plain "Stupid". For example. We've had little old ladies calling and asking if we can spay her cat. Leaving her name and number so we can get back to her. I had a notion to call her back and say, "We don't spay no stinking cats". You are probably thinking that's insensitive of me. No, I'm not insensitive, that's just the way my brain processes information. "Listen, People".

Another instance occurred this week. A young 20 something lady called thinking we were the Erie County Humane Society. She was from the Ottawa County Humane Society and wanted information regarding bingo night that the Erie County Humane Society has, to raise funds for the animal shelter. She said, "My name is Julie with the Ottawa County Humane Society. I would like some information regarding your bingo night". Blah, Blah Blah. I felt like calling her back to punk her too. "Listen People"

Hey, you're probably thinking I'm making this stuff up. Not a chance. I have a vivid imagination, but not that vivid. But I do have two words. "Listen People"

Give Me Liberty

It's unbelievable that over a year has passed since I have blogged. Being the great procrastinator that I am, I've finally decided to sit down at the keyboard and pound out some of my thoughts. Thanks to Heidi, Ande and Jacki (who all coaxed me) I'm back at it. They're either starved for entertainment or delusional--take your pick.

A few Saturdays ago Jan and I decided to go to the Sandusky Mall. As we were driving on Rt. 250 we noticed standing on the side of the road a young lady dressed as the Statue of Liberty. She was wearing a light blue toga, with a light blue tiara and holding a torch. Since there was about a foot of snow and the temperatures were hovering around zero, we both felt this was very strange. She was out drumming up business for Liberty Tax Service. The poor lady had to be freezing her booty off. As we drove past in our warm car, we waved to her as she waved back with a smile. More than likely her smile was frozen on her face. Now how many people would actually say to themselves, "Let's get our taxes prepared right now"? I know I've seen this scene before. Probably in Florida where the temperature was about 80 degrees, not in the frozen tundra of Sandusky Ohio on a frigid January morning. I'm sure this gig didn't pay well. Picture yourself wearing a bed sheet, waving at cars, freezing your ass off, on the busiest road in Sandusky. You couldn't pay me enough money, that's for sure.

A few nights after this episode, once again we were driving to the mall. Again, standing and waving on the side of the road was "Miss Liberty". This time it was completely dark, and it was a replacement "Miss Liberty". No doubt the first "Miss Liberty" told her boss to either shove it, or she was in the hospital suffering with pneumonia.

No doubt this is where the phrase "Givk thise Me Liberty or Give Me Death" originated.


PS: They actually have machines in Ann Arbor, MI. Check this out courtesy of my niece Jacki.

I'm Baaaack!

Wow it's hard too believe that I haven't blogged for about 45 days---- where has the time gone? A few people have mentioned that I get off of my dead a$$ and start writing again. The past week I have been reading Heidi's blog, and it has been very entertaining (at her expense). It will be difficult to top her "Hawaiian Vacation" experience.

Politically Incorrect or Politically Correct?

About 3 weeks ago a newspaper article was published that Santa Claus (in Australia) could no longer use Ho! Ho! Ho! because it was apparently offensive "to the ladies of the night". I really got a kick out of this article. The word "hoe" is slang in America for a prostitute. Now politically correct or not, I can't see how using the word Ho would hurt their feelings. It makes you wonder at times who comes up with this garbage. It is also unlikely that a young child would understand what a "hoe" is. This is just one example of having politically correctness jammed down our collective throats.

In recent years, sports teams have come under fire by the PC cops. Miami University (Ohio), once known as the Redskins are now known as the Redhawks. It seems that the native Americans were not fond of Miami using Redskins as their nickname.

In 2001, The University of Hawaii changed their nickname from the Rainbow Warriors to simply Warriors. The word rainbow was probably dropped because it has a "gay" connotation. For years the Cleveland Indians have been under constant pressure from native Americans to change the team's nickname. Perhaps the likeness of Chief Wahoo is the main reason why the native Americans want the nickname changed.

Prior to 1980 we never even heard of the term Political Correct. Why must the government censor our use of the English language? What ever happened to our freedom of speech? Will it ever end?

Here are some more politically correct terms:

Housewife = Domestic Engineer

Stewardess = Flight Attendant

Waitress/Waiter = Server

Merry Christmas = Seasons Greetings

I could go on and on. What are your favorites?

Always remember the PC police are watching you!